Sleep

I am tired. I need sleep. In a few minutes, after entertaining some pretty dubious ideas and getting stressed about any number of things, I’m going to do just that thing. Yes, I’ve been busy, and that’s why I haven’t put anything up here recently, although as always I’ve been eagerly taking notes about all […]

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I am tired. I need sleep. In a few minutes, after entertaining some pretty dubious ideas and getting stressed about any number of things, I’m going to do just that thing.

Yes, I’ve been busy, and that’s why I haven’t put anything up here recently, although as always I’ve been eagerly taking notes about all sorts of interesting events and ideas from my life recently, where I’m at, where I’m going, and how exactly it feels to waste three weeks wrestling with something called a ‘mysql.sock’ file while finding new ways to explain to people why this prevents me from making their website as quickly as I had originally planned. Yes, the life of the freelance web developer isn’t quite the rose-tinted week-long party I’d conned myself into believing it was, but the contract work is going well, even if everything else feels like it’s coming apart at the seams…

Since you’ve all been asking, the new trading name is ‘andAgile’, and one of these days I’ll have a full site up, and I’ll discuss the products and services of this entity in more detail. The reason for calling it andAgile? It follows the ‘andSomething’ theme, and in many ways agility is going to be the name of the game. I hadn’t really made that clear, about the general idea; I’ve gone freelance, and now I’m contracting, I’m free to be a success or a disaster or anywhere inbetween all by myself. It’s what I’ve always wanted to do and now I have it.

The abusive and esoteric comments are great, guys; I’m going to put up profiles of the regulars very soon, so we all know who we’re dealing with ;-) Look forward to more soon about mysql.sock, Robin Askwith and how to not buy coke from your local Tesco. It’s all good!

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Serious

Just a quick post tonight; I’ve been busy again, partly taking some time out to relax, with getting back to work and getting stuck into some freelance jobs, and with setting up my new laptop (which I bought along with some other stuff as part of getting myself set up as a mercenary. Sorry, freelance […]

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Just a quick post tonight; I’ve been busy again, partly taking some time out to relax, with getting back to work and getting stuck into some freelance jobs, and with setting up my new laptop (which I bought along with some other stuff as part of getting myself set up as a mercenary. Sorry, freelance web developer. I did say I’d post about my next few moves, didn’t I? And I didn’t, did I? I even have my company/trading name, the URL has been bought and the hosting paid for… And it’s not Kraton, Defeater of Meat Slugs, it’s a lot less exciting but more useful.

Now, I hadn’t posted this before, and I partly was waiting a little bit, but here it is. Tee, who you’ll either know personally, or know of because you read this site and you know I go on about her from time to time, has put up a moving and honest post dealing with a serious issue on her site, ideasforcheapstuff.com (the site of the three deliciously lickable girls) and it’s something that I think people should read; I should warn you now that it’s serious stuff, and you should approach it with an open mind. I think everyone could learn something from it. The events Tee writes of happened barely a week and half after I met her for the first time, so I got caught up in it all, and it’s touched me too in that sense. Just read it, and think about it, maybe follow the links she gives and hopefully if it helps even one person who reads it then that can only be a good thing.

http://www.ideasforcheapstuff.com/wordpress/2006/06/15/confronting-suicide/

So I’m glad I’ve put that up; please don’t comment on it here, just read it and think about it.

In other news, today was my first day as a contractor for a company I’ll be doing work for over the next while (it’s ‘web stuff’, that’s all you need to know, and it is very exciting stuff to be working on for someone like me.) which was great, although I had to take a lot of technical stuff in and now my brain is full, which when added to what I’ve had to deal with in setting up my laptop (I’d rather punch myself repeatedly in the nuts than install a PC or a Mac for my own use again.) is almost too much to deal with and I’m toying with the idea of turning into a fully-fledged psychopath tomorrow, perhaps murdering some innocent bystanders on my to attacking my colleagues in the office with a chainsaw. Well, I might have considered it, but this evening I saw a Czech movie in the Czech embassy (Thanks for organising tickets to that Michaela!) and it was so remarkably miserable (And believe you me, the Czechs know how to do misery better than anyone, even people from Longford.) that you’d be incapable of harming anyone after watching it. You’d just think about it, and then break down in tears, while nearby children laugh and frolic, unaware of the sheer meaningless misery of life. It was good, don’t get me wrong, but it just seems that the point of view there is that everyone is either a bastard, or a weak fool, and everyone gets what they deserve, or gets betrayed, or things just go pear-shaped for everyone generally. Also try to see a movie called ‘Czech Dream’ (‘Cesky Sen’), where some students get a grant and then set out to make everyone very miserable, even though they were all perfectly happy to start with, just to make a point that they weren’t really all that happy to begin with. I’m being fairly facetious about it, but it’s not far off the mark, and bloody typical too.

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Name

I’m going to be a ‘Sole Trader’. I’m going to do work for people, charge them for it, and then with that give them an invoice with a silly name on it which is the name I will be trading under. Sort of like a company name, which allow me to justifiably get a URL […]

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I’m going to be a ‘Sole Trader’. I’m going to do work for people, charge them for it, and then with that give them an invoice with a silly name on it which is the name I will be trading under. Sort of like a company name, which allow me to justifiably get a URL based on that (even an Irish one, in fact, although it’s generally a tedious and vastly over-priced process) and to design an identity for it. So, in a nutshell, I need to come up with a name for my professional endeavours, something which is reasonably simple, reflective of what I’m about as a Freelance operator (I promised to write more about that, and I will) and will be something that in years to come will be synonymous with the work I’ve done and the quality of that work. A brand name.

So, I’ve had to start thinking about it, and it’s actually a bit difficult. I originally envisaged andCurve being that brand, but now here you are, reading some occasionally entertaining diatribes on a number of issues, and I have to actually keep that separate from my professional life. I still might release software under this name, but that’s a separate issue. It’s now a brand for my hobby, as it were (though that’s no bad thing, and I think everyone should have a brand for their hobby; if it’s a good hobby, get an office, get an identity, hire some people and incorporate. The thing is, when you run out of money it’ll all end in tears, and you’ll wish you’d taken up knitting instead.) and I’d like to keep them separate so as not to confuse people. Or indeed offend potential or existing customers.

Names: well, here go. A list. I used to come up with names for my ‘umbrella projects’ (my various ideas for things I wanted to do, encapsulated in big, sprawing concepts which never went anywhere) on a weekly basis, and I’ve started looking through the notebooks again to help me out. I was a lot more creative back then, which actually means I was churning out a lot more redundant and downright useless ideas back then.

Clever IT company-type names

  • EnergyPoint
    We are a point of energy. At this point, you can find energy. With us. At the point. Where there is energy.
  • Dynamik
    Dynamik reflects how we are energetic and forward-thinking. We are also different, which is why we misspelled the word.
  • Vertex
    The top. We are the highest point of this game, because we are clever and used a mathematical-sounding name. We are better and should also be paid more, even though we have a cheap-sounding name.
  • Gorkon
    Has potential. A name of power. Could be responsible for oil spills and eating shareholder’s babies. Respect us.

Dark, powerful meat-eater type names

  • Shibboleth
    Suggests something summoned from the other world, come to steal souls and create fear, while building your website.
  • Krull, Eater of Souls And DeFlowerer of Virgins!!!
    Could be handy for trading in Westmeath, where this kind of thing is generally respected. Might be a bit heavy on the dark conotations though.
  • Karkass
    You know, dead stuff. Stuff that is dead. We killed it. We are dead. I don’t know, really. Ask a Goth (if you know how to communicate with one, you’ll probably go for this one anyway). Hrrrgh, as they say.
  • Gorkon
    Has potential. A name of power. Could be responsible for oil spills and eating shareholder’s babies. Fear us.

Edgy, designer, new-media industry type names

  • MuffCramp
    Edgy. Might offend women (and everyone else), but suggests being at the cutting edge of creativity. We have such a good time it hurts. When we’re done with you, you’ll be sore too.
  • CockPoint
    We point to solutions, with our cocks. There’s a sort of homoerotic thing going on there, except there’s not because we’re not benders. We’re just very subversive and yet amazingly talented, which is why we can overtly base our identity around penis imagery.
  • Jizz
    Simple, elegant. We spurt creative goodness at you, and we’re so clever and good at what we do that we can call ourselves something like this and believe that you’ll think we’re amazing too. And not full of shit.

Weird nonsense names

  • Bxx5!
    Oh yes. My favourite word of the moment. Utterly meaningless, beyond being an exclamation which fascinates David Donohoe somewhat through my insistence on using it (that’s sort of an endorsement, so I’ll consider it). I should name my enterprises after it.
  • YakNeep
    Yaks are big, and we will be too. Neep is… »
  • Mr Squirrel
    Squirrels are cool and they do stuff. Just like us. We do stuff and are really cute too.
  • GurnardHead
    Gurnards are the best fish going, because they have Gurnard Heads. Find one, stare into it’s big, wet eyes and you will see what I mean. We are like Gurnards, and have little fin feet too.

Names that I’m actually considering using

  • andProcess
    Follows the andWhatever naming convention I’m into over the last few years. I’m a fan of process, so I’d like to communicate that in the name.
  • andAgile
    Follows the andWhatever naming convention I’m into over the last few years. I think ‘agile’ reflects lightweight flexibilty, which is something I think is very important in what I’m setting out to do.
  • adaptiveProcess
    I’m big into process, and I believe process should change and adapt to the needs of the situation.

If anyone has a better suggestion, not matter how bizarre or how many, comment below! And that means you too, Michaela.

Yeah, this whole freelance thing is tough. In the meantime, I’ve ordered my new notebook, an Apple MacBook Pro 2Ghz with vast amounts of… Everything, in fact. And books. Lots of books. And Windows XP which (believe it or not) I’ll install on my Mac when I get it; the new Macs all support Windows too, now and since I’ll have to support all the major systems (all two of them, and of those two, Windows is a good 94% plus of the the market) I might as well get one good notebook to do the job.

More on the way about my last week and last day on the job, a great game of footie, a hell of a weekend (some remarkable adventures kicked off recently), and what’s next. Oh, and for those of you who give a shit, the weather here has been fantastic. It really has. Started to break this evening but in Ireland all you need is that week and half of beaming ultraviolet and you know you’ve lived.
Myself, Kevin Teljeur, looking somewhat mean in the blazing sun a week ago after an interesting encounter in the phoenix park. And getting slightly burnt.Myself, looking somewhat mean in the blazing sun a week ago after an interesting encounter in the phoenix park. And getting slightly burnt. Click image to view larger version

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Busy

Me at work, doing my thing; as viewed through my webcam.
Yes, I’ve been busy recently, and although I may have mistakenly given the impression that I quit my job in a particularly dramatic fashion, sticking it to The Man in all my bridge-burning glory (“To Hell with you and your Goddamned job, I’m leaving! And I’m taking Michaela with me!”) it really wasn’t like that, and I gave four entire week’s notice. I also didn’t get Michaela, which was even more disappointing. The next reaction I’ve been getting is generally “Whooo! Must be so awkward to be there after writing all that!” and that hasn’t been the case either. At least, not more awkward than usual, which is actually more than most people would tolerate is one of the reasons I called it a day anyway. So business as usual.

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Yes, I’ve been busy recently, and although I may have mistakenly given the impression that I quit my job in a particularly dramatic fashion, sticking it to The Man in all my bridge-burning glory (“To Hell with you and your Goddamned job, I’m leaving! And I’m taking Michaela with me!”) it really wasn’t like that, and I gave four entire week’s notice. I also didn’t get Michaela, which was even more disappointing. The next reaction I’ve been getting is generally “Whooo! Must be so awkward to be there after writing all that!” and that hasn’t been the case either. At least, not more awkward than usual, which is actually more than most people would tolerate is one of the reasons I called it a day anyway. So business as usual.

I have been taking notes for a big post about what comes next after the four weeks is up, which is next Friday (Parallel got a day for free there, I’m a generous soul at heart) and I think you’ll all enjoy that one no end, especially since it publicly commits me to a particular direction in my life and of course I’ll have to see it through. On the upside, it will hopefully involve a bit more writing and that can’t be a bad thing (assuming, of course, that I actually do the writing). It’s very, very exciting for me right now, and even if things don’t work out, I’ll painstakingly document it here in much the way I don’t get around to documenting anything else, and you’ll all get a kick out of reading about it.

So, in the words of Richard Ashcroft of ‘The Verve‘, “Baby, Oooooooooh ahh yeah, Oh no no no, In my head, My Lord! My Lord! I’m a lucky man, this ain’t no symphony, slip slide slip slide, no no no, yeahhhh.”. If things don’t work out in the coming months I could always find myself the next Verve and write songs for them, it seems like easy work. I’m close to finishing Keith’s site at long last which has proven to be hard work partly because I spent a week and a half which wasn’t otherwise very busy at all fighting spam on this site (automated systems which know how to post comments on sites like this, repeatedly posting comments which are links to insurance sales sites and Viagra) and on the LTD site (check it out to see the most deliciously edible girls in the world, having way more fun than you or I). I eventually got around it but it was hard work, and then of course I started being busy again, and I still don’t know where all this stuff comes from. So I’ll post a link here when it’s done, and hopefully I’ll talk Keith into actually writing on it too.

I’ve been looking at my self-discipline too; I really could be so much more productive but I just somehow am not. I like sleeping. I like taking a walk somewhere. I like taking a moment to sit and drool while making a low humming noise. Stuff like that, I think, which makes life more enjoyable than trying to follow a path in the manner of a whizz-head with an F-15 strapped to his (or her) back. Even so, I should be using the extra time to get some work done instead of surfing the same crap news sites, or trying to by cheap Tadafil, or even chatting relentlessly to Romanian women (although, if you can manage it, it is very entertaining and educational, and winding them up is about as much fun as you can have, short of getting your nads paddled by Oompa Loopas). Speaking of which, I met an actual person on the Internet. I mean, someone I haven’t previously been introduced to by someone I already know, and as a result my English has deteriorated drastically over the last week and a half. My englis, he is not more so good as the time from one day, and you are no understan me soo good as now tehn. I am make her mistak wit the word. Yo are gett this from womans ho speak no englis soo good. You can see where this is going, so maybe if I spend less time chatting, and more time finishing Keith’s site, we’ll all be better off, if not as amused as before. I’ll write some more about this intriguing development very shortly, and the mechanics of meeting people online and in real-life quite shortly, because it ties in with a number of interesting discussions I’ve had recently, and some ideas which developed independently about that and my writing (and for a dramatic change of pace from my previous writings these ideas aren’t about the enslavement of women, or being offensive just for the Hell of it). Yo like wan yo see waht I rite yo abot these thing.

Lastly, I got a webcam: k_parallel (at) hotmail.com – yes, you have to be smart enough to decipher the bit in the middle, because I will spammed otherwise.
Me at work, doing my thing; as viewed through my webcam.Me at work, doing my thing; as viewed through my webcam.If you want to have a look at me, in my natural environment, add this address to your hotmail MSN contacts and watch away. I really don’t know why, but you’re welcome to. it only works on my office PC, but when I get my new laptop I’ll have it on most of the time, home or work. You’ll be able to see pretty quickly if the new career is working out or not.

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Boom

I was blown away as I was walking down Talbot Street; it just felt fantastic to be walking down this street, the energy that was there, the feeling that anything was possible, and it was hard for me to believe that I was walking down a street in Dublin where I’ve been living and working, […]

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I was blown away as I was walking down Talbot Street; it just felt fantastic to be walking down this street, the energy that was there, the feeling that anything was possible, and it was hard for me to believe that I was walking down a street in Dublin where I’ve been living and working, on and off, for the last thirty-three years. New shops, people from so many nations, and a real sense that a lot of these people were here because you can really make things happen here, there’s enough money and if you work hard you can have your share of the cake too. I thought that maybe the money in Ireland is now like a siphon effect, in that there’s a certain intertia which means after the whole economic boom of a few years ago the whole show just keeps itself going, drawing in more money and the people to earn it, which in turn draws in more money.
Talbot Street, recently; this is Ireland's future, and it's a hell of a rush! Also there are cheap clothes.Talbot Street, recently; this is Ireland’s future, and it’s a hell of a rush! Also there are cheap clothes. Click image to view larger version
The other thought I had was more personal, and that was this: the way I feel about Dublin is actually a reflection on how I feel about myself. If I dislike it (which happens frequently) then what it really means is that I’m unhappy about myself, my circumstances, other personal issues, which I project onto the city and the people in it. If I like it, if I think it’s interesting, if I think I’m seeing it in a new light, or having new ideas about it, then that too is a reflection on my own circumstances, and I should really look to myself to interpret those feelings.

So, you might be wondering then what my conclusion was about my feelings last Saturday, why I was feeling so positive about Dublin and excited to be a part of it, and if you haven’t heard about it already, then read on. In fact, read on anyway, because you might enjoy the detailed explanation. I felt good because last Thursday I handed in my notice on my job.

I quit.

It’s not that big a drama in many ways, and if anyone hadn’t expected it then it’s because they don’t know about the job, the company or indeed read my blog much, or even know me. If you know me in any capacity then you know what I do for a living, and how I feel about doing that for the company I work for, which is that I build web sites (Or rather, I build the display or output for web-based content management systems, and web sites. I’m quite good at it.) and that I’ve been growing increasingly frustrated with my job, hating it even.

I think the biggest part of the drama is that for people over the age of about twenty eight or so, leaving a job voluntarily is a big deal, and you only do it if you’re guaranteed of a new job which is something I’m not, at the moment. I had been looking for a new job for a while but not terribly enthusiastically since I hadn’t seen anything which was substantially better than the job I’ve just left, but the thing I’d been overlooking all this time was that at my age, with my experience, with my contacts, getting a new job in Ireland won’t be too traumatic; when I was in Australia two years ago, I found a reasonable job in two and a half weeks in Melbourne under adverse conditions (No money, Working Holiday Visa, limited contacts, skills not very saleable) from a standing start. Conditions this time around are considerably better in every way, so I’m pretty confident in everything being ok on that front.

People have been both curious and concerned about this whole development (Me too, let me tell you!), and have been asking me a lot about it, and there’s a pattern to the questions so I’ll tackle it in a web-friendly ‘Frequently Asked Questions’ style. It’ll make your lives easier, I think.

  • Oh my God! Are you ok?
    Yes, yes I am, I’m very ok and feeling better by the minute. Leaving a job is high and everybody should do it at some point (unless you happen to have a job you truly enjoy, in which case hang on to it! They’re hard enough to come by.). It’s all good.
  • What happened???
    A number of issues built up over time, and working in Parallel became harder and harder to do effectively while still feeling relatively good about the experience. After yet another blazing row with Pavel over something fairly inconsequential, I realised that the stress we’re all under was making itself felt, and changing my personality and the way I react to situations. So where was all that stress coming from?

    • First off the working environment isn’t great (and do keep in mind that this is to a degree subjective, and others will have their own opinions on these matters). Now, it’s far from a bad place to work, but at the same time, in order to provide what we call ‘solutions’ to what are known as ‘problems’ (not in the day to day sense, but in a web development sense) a developer needs support, organisation, planning and infrastructure, all of which I believe were lacking for me and some of the people I work with. This leads to stresses and strains on projects and personal relationships, breaks morale and makes life very difficult. There’s a lot I could say about this, and go into ridiculous detail, but that is as much as anyone should need to know. I hate seeing things being done badly, when I’m involved with whatever it is that’s being done badly. If you feel your working environment is militating against you, then even the smallest tasks become difficult and stressful. Very stressful. And you know what they say: Stress is a killer.
    • Secondly, working in Parallel is no longer doing my so-called career any favours. I haven’t learnt anything new, which I haven’t actively pursued for my own purposes. There’s been no advancement, no financial reward, no expression of the experience I have in the field. That is bad. I mean, if I was hopping around between jobs and trying out different things, then of course I could expect to have little in the way of ‘career advancement’ but if I stay in one company for several years then either things should advance, I should get more responsibility, more pay, more training and experience, or things stop moving and I become obsolete. Remember that my work is primarily in the Internet field, building stuff for the Web. If there’s one thing which everyone knows all too well about this area, then it’s that things move fast. Very fast. I very much doubt that in Parallel I’ll be able to make a good case for making use of any of the new, upcoming technologies in my work, and that will fairly soon render my skills obsolete.

      There are knowledge areas which I have some very advanced knowledge in which won’t become obsolete any time soon; for example, CSS (Cascading Style Sheets) because although it’s a simple technology which takes a day to learn, it takes years of painful experience to master. On the other hand, that’s one small part of the whole Web Interface skillset, and some other areas can change rapidly; an old technology which has suddenly come to forefront is something known as AJAX, which I’ll need to become skilled with if I’m going to keep working in this area and stay competitive with the ten-year-olds who learn this stuff at school. Then there are bigger jumps, such as moving from the User Interface stuff to different areas such as application programming with an actual programming language such as Java or C#.

      The other aspect of career development is that as well as knowing more and gaining knowledge, there’s the aspect of vertical career movement, whereby I would be managing other guys who know this stuff, and for several reasons I don’t see that ever happening for me at Parallel, from lack of opportunity to typecasting. So, apart from getting better at what I do, I’m not going to progress in any other way.

      To summarise; if I’m going to keep doing this web stuff for a living and take it further, then Parallel is probably not the best place to advance my career.

    • Lastly, there’s the small issue of the shares. Some people know about it, some don’t but here it is in a nutshell. Five years ago, in the heady days of the Internet Gold Rush in Ireland, everything related to the Internet was worth it’s weight in gold and diamonds and when the opportunity came up to invest in Parallel through a Government tax incentive scheme (known as a ‘Business Expansion Sceme’) a number of us jumped at the chance and put money in. Like some others, I took out a loan to finance it, over a similar period of time, to the tune of €7,300 or so. All good. However, things turned sour, the Internet bubble burst and Parallel did badly. Better than some which sank quickly but even so things were rough and this is a story for another day, suffice to say that the company survived and soldiered on. The shares recently matured, and so far appear to be worth nothing. At all.

      As you can imagine, having a fair idea of why exactly the company and therefore the shares might be worth nothing, I have no intention of sticking around to watch any more of the show unfold, given that in my mind I’ve paid for this. My money, funding a situation which I certainly wouldn’t allow if it were my company, evaporating (closer to the truth is that it has long since evaporated). At the end of the day I learnt a lesson and the hard truth is that investments are a risk and that’s life, you win you lose, it’s only money.

    So, last Wednesday I thought about it one last time, and then I wrote the resignation letter, and resigned on Thursday morning. It’s a cracker actually, one of my better pieces of prose recently and it’s a shame I can’t post it. You have to do these things with a sense of humour if you want to stay on the same page, that’s all I’ll say, because there are no silver bullets.

  • What did Tom say??
    Tom is the CEO of Parallel, which makes him my (former) bossman. I think he was slightly caught off guard but I can’t imagine that he wasn’t expecting it in the long grass. Not with the granularity of the way things have been, and the way we haven’t been getting our ducks in a row. At least now that we’ve squared the circle and engaged with the situation, we’ll be able to decouple and kick it to touch.
  • Really am I ok??
    Yes, really! Buzzed man, buzzed!
  • How do I feel now?
    Slightly jittery, in a way, but truly free. Empowered. I can make decisions. It’s scary and yet exhilarating. I’ve been saying to people it’s quite a buzz, an adrenaline rush and I should do this more often. It’s like an extreme sport. I guess it’s why people gamble with large sums of money.
  • What did Annette say??
    Annette is my housemate/landlady. Well, Annette knew that I was thinking about it but like everyone else probably didn’t expect me to do it until I had the new job in the bag. It’s the Guerilla Career, ladies!
  • Do I have a new job lined up?
    Not yet, but there are a number of possibilities, some which were about before I did this, and some which have cropped up in the last couple of days. It’s not looking too bad, I just have to decide what to do. Full-time, part-time, contract, freelance, maybe something completely different altogether (writing, anyone?)… The possibilities are actually the problem, there are so many.

    If you have a suggestion of any sort or a job lead either comment below or call/text me (+353 86 856 2978), or email me!

  • Bxx5!
    Yes, very much so. But it could go the other way too, and that mightn’t be a bad thing, unless it collapses. hUxx0rz!

So there you have it. The best move yet of 2006 and fully in line with the master plan, so expect more daring and surprising moves quite soon. There are plans afoot…

In the meantime, I’ve seen ‘Dig!‘ the riotous, messy story of the Brian Jonestown Massacre and the Dandy Warhols, which is great demonstration of how not to pursue your creative dream; I thoroughly recommend it to you, especially if you have any interest in the creative process or music. It’s a rollercoaster. I also went to see ‘The Devil and Daniel Johnston‘ a week ago which is a movie treading a similar path and again I recommend it, rivetting stuff about the fine line between creative genius and madness. I’m not a creative genius, and never will be, but it’s humbling to see how people who do have it can make a meal of it in one way or another. I need to be happy with what I have and just work hard to get where I’m going to.

(Continuously re-edited to solved a line-break problem. Am I the only person who hates Internet Exploder this much?)

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